Zip. Zilch. Nada.

Well, after a bit of a delay, they finally released the short story contest results this week. And I got... Nothing. Did not place. No honorable mention. Nada.

I knew going in that a fairy tale was a risk, mainly because of my tendency toward flowery language. And, as you will see below, the judges definitely dinged me for some of my more colorful word choices. I still love my story, and the feedback shows that, above all, they were most critical of the parts of the story they misunderstood. Which means I wasn't clear enough. Something to work on, and always a challenge with a 24-hour story. 

I am generally very good with criticism, feedback, whatever you want to call it. I enjoy the praise and learn from the critiques. Most of what the judges had to say I can apply to make the story better, clearer, and will do so. But I feel like I detect a note of condescension in some of the feedback I received from them this time around. Case in point: explaining to me that a nod indicates yes while a head shake means no. Gee, thanks a lot. Maybe I'm being oversensitive, but these folks seemed a bit grumpy this time around, and it took a bit of the enjoyment out of it, if I'm being honest. Chill out, guys.  This is supposed to be fun.

Here is what they had to say:
Bravery and the Marrow Man by Cayce Osborne
WHAT THE JUDGES LIKED ABOUT YOUR STORY:
{JUDGE 1750}  This is a stand-out and stylish tale. The affected language and primordial detail work to elevate a suspenseful tale of secrets and destiny. Not bad at all for a work of about 1500 words.
I smiled at the effective phrase "jellied legs." There were quite a few interesting turns of phrase.
The entire paragraph that details preparing the body for the Marrow Man...the sun symbols on the eyelids and all...was exquisite. I also liked that they are sun god worshipers. Refreshing.
It was wise, in this case, to use the fairy tale trope of repetition. It was important to underline the genre for this story to work properly, I think. 
{JUDGE 1686}  The concept of the Marrow Man and the morbid rumours about him are intriguing. 
{JUDGE 1739}  The ceremony that the Marrow Man perform is fantastic.  Such a small snapshot of this world and yet it was wonderfully and fully formed. 
{JUDGE 1742}  Very mystical like a classical folklore legend. I was intrigued by the alluring feel of it all. The names like Marrow Man and Bravery are a very neat touch. I also liked the italic poems which create a very legendary element to it as well.  
{JUDGE 1598}  The opening is arresting and draws the reader into the story. Bravery undergoes a transformation during the course of the story that is satisfying and original. It's a good twist that the rumors about Marrow Man were wrong. 
{JUDGE 1689}  I love how you explore the classic power of naming and names in your tale—in particular, the power of knowing one’s real name and the meaning of it. The scene where Grandmother dies is filled with delicious feeling: great choice to have Grandmother fail to pass on the secret before she dies. I love that Bravery decides to follow her Grandmother’s corpse—and the echoing plea works well, too—and the wonderfully mysterious and magical actions of the Marrow Man that she witnesses. 

WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK:
{JUDGE 1750}  The approach to language in this tale might throw some readers off; it did me at the very beginning, and I knew from the genre statement that it was going to be a Fairy Tale (the second sentence was the toughest and the one I'd recommend rewriting). However, I got used to it pretty quickly--I think once I accepted "wondery" I had no more problems.
I would have hyphenated "atremble," though.
Bravery seems to relax her oath regarding staying by her grandmother's side pretty easily, huh? Kids these days.
{JUDGE 1686}  My only criticisms/considerations are small technicalities. For example, Bravery says she won't leave her grandmother's side until she knows the secret of her name, but then she immediately leaves to go to bed. Also, I couldn't help but wonder how Bravery knows what is written on the parchment/that her question will be answered by the parchment (though the reader understands because of narrative conventions).
{JUDGE 1739}  On first reading, I wasn't quite sure if the parchments were presented to the families of the dead, what their significance was, or even if the families knew about them.  Consider exploring their role in this society.
{JUDGE 1742}  I think I could have used a bit more description on the world. I like your brief description of the mountains and you are evidently a good writer, but I could not place the era nor could I really truly imagine it. I love the set up with the marrow Man and you have great pacing but there is room to expand what we are seeing clearly because without that, it's hard to really get into the story.
{JUDGE 1598}  In the second to last paragraph, Marrow Man shook his head in response to Bravery's request. That kind of gesture usually means a no answer. But in the next paragraph Bravery left holding the secrets of the dead, which indicates he granted her request. Consider having Marrow Man nod in response to her request, a gesture that is typically interpreted as a positive response. 
{JUDGE 1689}  First thing, small but helpful—don’t call her Bravery because we know what that means. Instead hide it from her and from us. Make the quality something more complex—so that it fits all the lively details and nuances of your tale. Reveal this quality by slowly breaking Bravery free of observations into action. Make sure those actions reveal her love, strength, and bravery so we can see her earning her name even while she remains unaware of it.

So what do you guys think? A hint of condescension, or no?